Hefekrise!

Was hab ich falsch gemacht?

Am Freitag lief alles...wenn nicht perfekt, dann auch gar nicht schlecht. Ich hab micht Sorgen gemacht, dass der Vorteig nicht lebendig genug war, folglich hab ich einen zweiten Vorteig bereitet und zugemischt. Der Teig hat sich glatt ausrollen lassen und am Ende war der Ranft schön knusprig unten und sanft oben.

Aber vorigen Abend war es anders. Mit dem Vorteig, kein Problem: Er hat hübsch geperlt und gerochen. Aber viel hat er sich nicht vergrößert. Dann am Kneten und Ausrollen war er nur zäh und und aufsässig. Ich hab fast eine Viertelstunde damit gerungen, bevor ich das Ganze in den Mülleimer weggeschissen habe und noch einmal von vorne angefangen hab, doch es war die gleich Geschichte mit dem neuen Los.

Nun war es halb elf und ich hatte keine Geduld mehr. Die Füllung war gargekocht und ich wollte alle die leckren Zwiebeln nicht vergeuden. Außerdem hatte ich schon versprochen, das Gericht morgen zu liefern. Durch unmässige Bemühung rollte ich den verdammten Teig aus bis er sich fast zu den Rändern vom Blech ausgestreckt hat, strich das Zwiebelgemenge drauf und warf das Blech in den Ofen. Nach einer halben Stunde probierte ich ein Ranftbrocken: Härter als Zwieback! Ich hab überlegt, ob ich die Füllung nicht abkratzen sollte und als Aufstrich servieren, aber ich möchte keine Entscheidung aus Verzweiflung und Ausschöpfung treffen.

Heute morgen hab ich ein Scheible gekostet und fand es nicht aasig, so hab ich das Ding mitgebracht und wurde es meinen Kollegen füttern--samt Verzeihungen. Ich glaube, ich nenne es "Zwiebelkatastrophe" um.

Executive summary of previous post

(Courtesy of bengt; I may commission him to summarise all my German-language posts.)

Ok, so he was cooking something this weekend, but it sure wasn't working for him at all. My original impression was that it was bread, but the actual translation was "dough" or "mixture".. and then he added onions to it and that didn't work so well either. Finally he took it to his fellow workers or something and is considering calling it "OnionCatastrophe"

On the prowl

This morning, we had more unfamiliar people tramping through the department. When I saw the first guy, I assumed it was the architects returning and went back to my work; out of the corner of my eye, I glimpsed his considerably more daddyish partner follow him out into the hall.

I immediately felt a need to visit the drinking fountain.

Not bad: Fiftyish, white-haired, strong nose and chin; big, hairy arms, round but firm bely. Crackers and cheese, maybe. I heard him speak and his accent (or, should I say, his ehaccint) made me suspect that perhaps he wasn't so white collar after all. When I got back to my desk, I alerted fellow bear-fancier Herr Speck to his presence. He shot me back an e-mail saying he had spotted the guy almost an hour earlier outside Personnel (they're from Risk Management)--and gotten totally busted! He'd also gotten busted earlier scoping out a chubby guy on the second floor.

As it turned out, I had some business on the second floor, but the only ursine around was a husky plasterer who was rather "backschön" (to awkwardly anglicise a Japanese word brought to my attention by aadroma). I did get a chance to harrass Granola Boy about his new look. He's been wearing cords and flannel for as long as I've known him, but his hippie-length hair has just been traded in for a buzz cut and his beard has been shorn to a goattee. He's a cub and he didn't know it! Just now, I sent him some literature to orient him in his new lifestyle.

T is for "Terrible Television"

I can't remember now how bunj and I were reminded of The Letter People. This crudely-made daytime television show from the mid-70's--ugly as only products of that era can be--was designed to teach little lawn monkeys like me phonics. (Or, I guess, the subsequent generation of yard apes, since by the time I encountered them I could already read with facility.) The opening theme went:

Come and meet the Letter People
Come and join the family
Words are made of Letter People
A - B - C - D - follow me!

and was sung over some simultaneously tripped-out and banal animation of children skipping into a grove. The muppety characters looked awful shoddy to our Sesame Street-shaped sensibilities, though they were similarly gender-challenged. See, all the consonants were men and vowels women. I was telling this to an acquaintance on the el last night and he responded:

"What about the letter Y?"

The brought me up short; he started guffawing. "Imagine the possibilities!" Try as I could, I couldn't think how they got around "and sometimes Y". Each of the character had mnemonic nicknames--the only one I remember is "Tall Teeth" for Mr T. Can you guess what Y is for?

Much to the dismay of nostalgists (who deride it as "political correctness"), massive sex changes have brought about gender parity among the updated Letter People™ marketed by Abrams & Company (who acquired the rights in 1990)--not heavily marketed, I might add, since I have done some shopping for my nephews and never ran into them.