Bear Pride Report #3: Bent Over Laughing

[muckefuck]

Now I don't bend over for just anyone, you know, but it happened to me twice over the weekend.

We were at Circuit for the end of the Online Party. Since it's reputed to be the best place in Chicago to find skinny Latino boys, I've never had any reason to go there before. It's a goddamn hangar! Only with comfy couches, which we naturally gravitated to. At one point, I was making small talk with a friendly cub (who shall remain nameless for his own protection); when he told me his address, I gasped. "That's the building right next to monshu's!"
"I know; I see him on the bus. I cruise him, but he never looks at me."
[I fall over the couch laughing]
"Well, he's very single-minded." This is a nice way of saying "completely oblivious". It took three years of flirting to get him to notice me.
"He must've noticed. I mean, I'm just so obvious. I'm only telling you this because I'm drunk."
I'm still laughing, so monshu's like "What's so funny?"
"He lives next door to you."
"Really? I don't remember seeing him."

Monday afternoon, I was looking for Hector so I could return his jacket and Nuphy and I could skedaddle. He and Mr Trucker/Fluffer had talked about going to the deck, so I'm poking around for them without much success when I run into e_ticket and a couple of his pals. I start talking about how I've teased Mr T/F about becoming a freelance leather consultant, how he'd have to hit the books to bone up on local nudity laws "to know how much rosebud you can let show, for instance. He says that in Illinois, there has to be a two-inch strap."
e_ticket: I just love the fact that they have laws going into this kind of detail....Can you imagine the rowdy meeting where they came up with that?
Me: I don't think they were rowdy. I think everyone was sitting there very uncomfortably. 'Ahem...uh...and now the statute on...er...acceptable rectal exposure.'"
e_ticket: 'Six inches? No, that's way too much!'
Me: "'Mr Adamson...you...er...have a report.' 'Yes, sir...uh...UMass Amherst did a survey of average sphincter size in American males...'"
Friend of e_ticket: Not a survey; a straw poll.

Comments

[rollick.livejournal.com]

I read "It's a goddamn hanger!" five or six times, trying to figure out exactly what this was bear-slang for, before I realized you probably meant it was cavernous and looked like it should house airplanes. Either that, or it's a bent piece of wire.

[muckefuck.livejournal.com]

No "looked like" about it. It was a hanger. Prefab arched struts, corrugated metal roof, bare concrete floor and all. Even the Skate Barn in Warrenton looked less sparse and industrial.

[lil-m-moses.livejournal.com]

(hangar)

[muckefuck.livejournal.com]

D'OH!