This time with a lack of feeling

It's really kind of incredible what difference good sleep makes when it comes to my entire physical and emotional state. Friday night I feel asleep about an hour later than I should have (12:30 as opposed to 11:30); as a result, Saturday I was a complete wreck: my bowels were in an uproar, I was eating badly, I was crying at songs that normally don't even make me choke up, I was obsessing about BB like I hadn't in a couple weeks, etc. Sunday night, however, I turned the light off at 11:15 and slept through until 5:20 or so and I woke up today emotionally balanced and full of energy.

So let's give that proposed post another go, shall we?

A week ago Sunday, I got a random friend request on FB, so I did what I usually do when I get those and I sent the guy a DM. He replied, we chatted in Spanish, and it soon became evident that he had confused FB with Growlr. But he was hot and local so I went with it. He quizzed me about my deets and we exchanged naughty pics. I was horny enough that I almost asked him to come over that afternoon, but he didn't have a car so I suggested that we try to meet up the next weekend, when <clintswan> and I were intending to go out. He seemed amenable so I said we'd chat later and wished him well.

The next evening, I went to send him a message and found that he had unfriended and blocked me. Since I couldn't think of any cause I'd given him to do so, I shook my head and shrugged it off.

Then Wednesday, almost the exact same thing happened again: random request, chatting in Spanish, deets and pics. He even asked some of the exact same slightly odd questions. Now I've been approached like this before over the years, but twice in the same week is surprising. Moreover, despite the fact that Wednesday's cub had a completely different name, he looked so strikingly like the guy from Sunday that I actually put their photos side-by-side to compare just to make sure this wasn't a lunatic's sockpuppet account.

Soon we proceeded to videochatting. Since then, he's been messaging me every day. By Friday I could tell that--despite my attempts not to make my flirting too encouraging--he was developing a crush on me and decided I needed to splash some cold water. When he asked, "Do you think you could date someone long-distance?" I said, "I honestly don't know", which was clearly not what he wanted to hear. Saturday I hardly heard from him, but by Sunday he had bounced back and it was more dirty talk, sharing banalities, and so forth.

Two men with similar backgrounds in similar circumstances, two vastly different outcomes. I ended the week with gay whiplash.

Fortunately, I did eventually pull my sad self together on Saturday and went out with my bestie to Touché. Sad Cub was looking for something to do, so he joined us there. It was slow though, so to make things interesting I hailed a cutie over and struck up a conversation. He introduced us to the guys he'd been hanging with, acquaintances from the day before. One of them was entering the sashless leather contest that night, which gave me someone to root for, and by midnight I was in a completely different headspace than twelve hours earlier.

It never got packed (which, honestly, I'm grateful for) but it did get busy and I ran into a few bar buddies, but nothing like I would on a regular Bear Night. Clint was long gone and at some point I lost track of Sad Cub, but I found my new buddy in the back bar and engaged him on the topic of BDSM.

That's about the point where BB walked in.

[to be cont.]