Poll time!

[muckefuck]

You have my personal guarantee that this survey is not one whit more dumbass than the last ten surveys that you have completed and posted in your journal. (If this comes as cold comfort, well, then you have only yourself to blame, don't you?) My answers will follow at the end of the day.

1. What is your favourite maritime empire?
2. How many people died in the city you were born the year that you were born there?
3. Name a song you hate. Now, compose a question to which the word or phrase that makes up the song title supplies a misleading answer. Post it.
4. Look at the sole of your shoe. If there is any writing there, transcribe it into rot13 and post it.
5. The last offensive joke that you laughed at victimised which minority group?
6. How many different forms of pasta can you name? [No need to list them individually if the answer is fewer than 14.]
7. The tortoise lays on its back, its belly baking in the hot sun beating its legs trying to turn itself over but it can't, not without your help, but you're not helping. Why is that?
8. Take the house number of the first street address you can recall having lived at, multiply it by the number of stories in the house and divide by the total number of legs for all chordates acknowledged to be living with you at the time. Represent the result in a non-decimal scale of numerical notation of your choice.
9. If you were a cell component, which one would you be and why?
10. Name three parts of your body that have ever been shaved.

Comments

[bunj.livejournal.com]

1. What is your favourite maritime empire?

Tough call, but I always had an unexplained fondness in my heart for the Portuguese.

2. How many people died in the city you were born the year that you were born there?

54

3. Name a song you hate. Now, compose a question to which the word or phrase that makes up the song title supplies a misleading answer. Post it.

"(Everything I Do) I Do It For You" by Bryan Adams, from the Robin Hood: Prince of Thieves soundtrack.

“Why are you compelled to answer inane LiveJournal surveys?”

4. Look at the sole of your shoe. If there is any writing there, transcribe it into rot13 and post it.

Ynaq'f Raq

5. The last offensive joke that you laughed at victimised which minority group?

It’s been a while, but probably homosexuals, homophobes, or gamers.

6. How many different forms of pasta can you name? [No need to list them individually if the answer is fewer than 14.]

Spaghetti, orichietti, penne, elbow macaroni, manicotti, shells, spaghettini, bowtie, rigatoni, gnocchi, tortellini, ravioli, fettuccini, linguini, dinosaur-shaped, and cannelloni.

I can’t remember the name of the hollow spaghetti ones right now, so I guess they don’t count.

7. The tortoise lays on its back, its belly baking in the hot sun beating its legs trying to turn itself over but it can't, not without your help, but you're not helping. Why is that?

A tortoise. What’s that?

8. Take the house number of the first street address you can recall having lived at, multiply it by the number of stories in the house and divide by the total number of legs for all chordates acknowledged to be living with you at the time. Represent the result in the non-decimal scale of numerical notation of your choice.

Since the number of acknowledged chordates varied over time, I’m taking my numbers from when I first moved in: 205/9.

9. If you were a cell component, which one would you be and why?

I’ve always liked the mitochondria, maybe because it’s a parasite which made itself invaluable.

10. Name three parts of your body that have ever been shaved.

Unremarkable, but: face cheeks, front of neck and back of neck.

[(Anonymous)]

Wow. You must be really bored today...

-e

[bunj.livejournal.com]

Actually, it didn't take me very long at all; especially since I just made up the number of deaths.

[welcomerain.livejournal.com]

What is your favourite maritime empire?
ENGLAND BABY
How many people died in the city you were born the year that you were born there?
I don't know, the IDPH records online only go back to 1990.
Name a song you hate. Now, compose a question to which the word or phrase that makes up the song title supplies a misleading answer. Post it.
I'm not sure of your eternal faith in me, even though I am your bodyguard.
Look at the sole of your shoe. If there is any writing there, transcribe it into rot13 and post it.
Nope.
The last offensive joke that you laughed at victimised which minority group?
People who don't like to hear about RealDeer during dinner. Before that, children.
How many different forms of pasta can you name?
Rotini, spaghetti, mostaccioli, lasagna, capelli d'angelo, gnocchi, orechetti, ravioli, macaroni, tortellini, fettuccine... agh.
The tortoise lays on its back, its belly baking in the hot sun beating its legs trying to turn itself over but it can't, not without your help, but you're not helping. Why is that?
Because she won't live, you know.
Take the house number of the first street address you can recall having lived at, multiply it by the number of stories in the house and divide by the total number of legs for all chordates acknowledged to be living with you at the time. Represent the result in a non-decimal scale of numerical notation of your choice.
I don't *do* math.
If you were a cell component, which one would you be and why?
Definitely a cilium.
Name three parts of your body that have ever been shaved.
Armpit, leg, big toe.

[go-wade-in.livejournal.com]

How many different forms of pasta can you name? [No need to list them individually if the answer is fewer than 14.]

spaghetti, spaghettini, linguine, fusili, tortelini, orrechiette, penne, rigatoni, macaroni, manicotti, orzo, lasagna, farfalle, ravioli, fettucine

i cheated on the fettucine because i couldn't for the life of me remember what comes after the "f".

[go-wade-in.livejournal.com]

>> I’ve always liked the mitochondria, maybe because it’s a parasite which made itself invaluable. >>

the first time i heard of such a thing was when i was playing Parasite Eve on Playstation.

[bunj.livejournal.com]

And they say those games are bad for kids. They're educational.

[welcomerain.livejournal.com]

The first time I heard of mitochondria was reading A Wind In The Door by Madeleine L'Engle, one of my all-time favorite authors.

[lhn.livejournal.com]

Ditto, though for a while as a kid I wasn't sure whether farandolae were also real¹, once I'd learned that mitochondria were. (Actually, I think strictly speaking I first heard of them in A Swiftly Tilting Planet, which I read out of order and which had a brief reference to the previous book.)

¹Not as sapient beings, of course, but as sub-mitochondrial structures.

[gopower.livejournal.com]

1. The Brits

2. Physical death or just their souls?

3. If I don't like a song, I change the station, I don't memorize the song title.

4. Look at the sole of my shoe? If they couldn't fool me with that fag test in 4th grade, it ain't gonna work now.

5. Democrats (and they're getting smaller all the time!)

6. Carbs? How '90s.

9. Common Core Bio was the first (and only) class in which I literally fell asleep. The instructor, a middle-aged German doctor, spent the entire period reading aloud from her lecture notes, notes which she had previously handed out.

10. I'm willing to entertain suggestions.

[pacotelic.livejournal.com]

1. Indonesia. fourth most populous country and still colonising away
2. Hmm, carry the two... ~32,000. It was a lite year.
3. When can you get the best food at a tavern?
4. pbagntevc
5. The enfreckled
6. given time, I can name 689 types of pasta, but not all in Italian
7. Because you're just telling me about the tortoise. I am nowhere near the tortoise. It already smells pretty bad over there.
8. 20, but we had a pet Tunicate
9. Golgi Apparatus
10. cheek, cheek, and cheek

Talk about your trivial pursuits

[pacotelic.livejournal.com]

I think this could be the start of something wonderful. I may bite this quiz directly, or make up my own tedious quiz. Its a real testament to the dedication of your fans. Its a tricky move, indeed. Took balls.

[pacotelic.livejournal.com]

which side of your big toe?

[welcomerain.livejournal.com]

The top, where the hair comes out! Actually, now I wax or tweeze the big toes instead. If you were trying to trick me into revealing my sekrit werewolf alterego, you have FAILED!

[welcomerain.livejournal.com]

>snif< someone else who doesn't read my journal and has missed out on all my wacky surveys (http://www.livejournal.com/tools/memories.bml?user=welcomerain&keyword=Surveys&filter=all).

[pacotelic.livejournal.com]

Now it's time to erase that mistake.

At <lj user="pacotelic">'s request

[austingoddess.livejournal.com]

1. Definitely the Portuguese. Never liked the Dutch or the Spanish, really, and the English were just So. Friggin'. *English*. Second place goes to the Ottoman Empire for sheer diversity of goods, 3rd to the Venetians for good taste.
2. A lot.
3. "Gonna Sex U Up". So what am I going to do about your lewd behavior, Mr Construction Worker/Guy At Wal-Mart late night/Typical Bar Patron?
4. Shoes?? We don't need no stinkin' shoes! Hahahaha!
5. Stupid people....oh frag, that's a majority. Republicans...Xtians...dang. Sorry. Sheep piss me off.
6. Only 7 at the moment. Dang.
7. Because I'm an android and don't know it yet?
8. No.
9. Not a component - just a white cell. White cells do some really cool shit - watching them in action is to be in awe of the whole human body.
10. Calves/shins, armpits (but not anymore), and eyebrows (a big mistake).

[princeofcairo.livejournal.com]

1. The Venetians, followed closely by the Athenians and the Portuguese.
2. Too many.
3. "Does your love ever shut the hell up?"
4. No shoes! No writing!
5. The Irish.
6. Fewer than 14.
7. "Because she was a noted counterfeiter."
8. CCCXLI
9. Vacuole, so's I could have somewhere to store my loose DNA strand collection.
10. Jaw, throat, upper lip.

[robling-t.livejournal.com]

1. What is your favourite maritime empire?

Maybe I'm just an old-fashioned kind of girl, but I've always been rather partial to the Phoenicians...