May. 20th, 2019 11:19 am
Dream management
Ugh. I wish I knew what was up with these ructious dreams. Last night's was fairly typical. I was checking on my student employee and found him playing Pokémon at his workstation. (IRL I've had to speak to him a couple times about our appropriate use of electronics policies.) I told him bluntly that he knew that wasn't allowed and instead of being abashed (as he would be IRL) he was insolent which annoyed me into escalating things to the point that I fired him and threatened to toss his belongings into the busiest of the public areas if he didn't leave.
More often, it's a rando instead of someone I know in the waking world, but the basic template of me getting enraged as someone who remains smug and belligerent is constant. In the worst instances I end up getting violent, often attacking the person as they "refuse to stay down" (though in those cases it's usually a home invader or some other criminal). Regardless I wake up with my heart racing and then struggle to fall back asleep.
I guess this is simply more evidence that I'm carrying too much anger around me on a daily basis and I need to find some healthy way of letting it go before it kills me.
More often, it's a rando instead of someone I know in the waking world, but the basic template of me getting enraged as someone who remains smug and belligerent is constant. In the worst instances I end up getting violent, often attacking the person as they "refuse to stay down" (though in those cases it's usually a home invader or some other criminal). Regardless I wake up with my heart racing and then struggle to fall back asleep.
I guess this is simply more evidence that I'm carrying too much anger around me on a daily basis and I need to find some healthy way of letting it go before it kills me.