Businesses I will never own

Since Welcome Rain loves surveys so much, I decided to set down a few musings that could be viewed as answers to the question: What would you name your bar/bistrot? Of course, I'll never use any of these: If I'm too lazy to clean regularly, the chances that I would get involved in entrepeneurial food service are slimmer than slim. By I don't refrain from discussing baby names just because I'll never reproduce.

The Beard and Belly : Bear Bar and Grill Note that this is not a very "edgy" name, unlike those borne by current bear bars, e.g. CellBlock, FaultLine, or Jackhammers. Edgy can be good, but as far as bars go, I prefer comfy. (Or, to quote the White One, "The image I try to project in a bar is 'cuddly, but distant'.") It also enforces my own personal definition of Bearishness, which--as you can well image--is subject to endless debate within the fetish community.

Paincourt : Bakery and Café "Paincourt" literally means "short of bread" and is the Creole nickname for St. Louis in the early days of food shortages. This would have to be located in a historic building in downtown St. Louis (assuming there are any left which haven't been torn down for parking or parks) and could be decorated with the fruits of my research into times when it was still an interesting place to live. The bakery itself, as opposed to the dining area, would be nicknamed "Misère", which it would definitely be most of the year.

Xauxa : Barcelona-style Tapas Bar You want your edgy? Here's your edgy--though leavened with a heap of whimsy. "Xauxa" is Catalan for "Cockaigne", i.e. the folkloric Land of Plenty. I think it's originally the name of a locale in the Peruvian Andes, which gives me an excuse to mix in a few Latin American offerings (like chimichurri) into the traditional list of Catalan specialties (including more botifarra than you can shake a calçot at). My decorating theme might be a mythical Pyrenaean valley with frollicky faerie inhabitants. (To look at it another way, all grasshoppers and no ants.)

Vainly funny coincidence

At lunch, I happened to sit next to the elderly Scrabble game. It's usually over before I go, and everyone had the grim look of being in the second continuous hour of play. One lady played "da" (as in "dad (col.)") and the crotchety old man opposite her grumbled about challenging, but chose not to "so we can end this awful game". He wouldn't shut up about it, though, and did look it up. "For future reference," he announced, "'da' is not acceptable."

It's a good thing I'm not paranoiac. 'Specially since the next word the lady played was "wuss"