Jan. 2nd, 2020 12:23 pm
Holiday summary
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muckefuck*blows dust from cover*
I even brought home a laptop from work with the intention of writing entries from home but it never made it out of the carrying case. I'm not sure if it would've helped or not. Instead of journaling here I tended to post to FB (I think I made something like a half dozen posts each on Christmas Eve and Christmas Day) which drew some positive attention but didn't let me delve into my issues the way I can when everyone in the bloody world isn't listening in.
In short, my break started off rough and got better. Christmas Eve was the first time I've really cried for my father since he died. I tried distracting myself with a movie and ended up crying for Monshu instead. In retrospect, I probably should've done what I did last time I spent Christmas Eve in Chicago and gotten together for dinner with friends but I'm still figuring this shit out.
Christmas and St Stephen's Day weren't great either mainly because all that time in the kitchen led to problems in my feet. I finally got so spooked I went to urgent care for an x-ray, which of course found nothing, and followed up with a podiatrist, who diagnosed me with "overuse", which seems to be medical jargon for "getting old".
My anxieties relieved, I was able to really enjoy myself. That Friday turned out well and Saturday I had friends take me out for both brunch and a midday meal. Sunday I dined with Uncle Betty before we hit the bars and then paid for it on Monday. New Year's Eve day was games with JB & Co. and New Year's Day was games with new friends in North Park.
As a result, I've ridden the rollercoaster from feeling nearly abandoned to feeling surrounded with love. I'm looking forward to getting back to something of an even keel.
I even brought home a laptop from work with the intention of writing entries from home but it never made it out of the carrying case. I'm not sure if it would've helped or not. Instead of journaling here I tended to post to FB (I think I made something like a half dozen posts each on Christmas Eve and Christmas Day) which drew some positive attention but didn't let me delve into my issues the way I can when everyone in the bloody world isn't listening in.
In short, my break started off rough and got better. Christmas Eve was the first time I've really cried for my father since he died. I tried distracting myself with a movie and ended up crying for Monshu instead. In retrospect, I probably should've done what I did last time I spent Christmas Eve in Chicago and gotten together for dinner with friends but I'm still figuring this shit out.
Christmas and St Stephen's Day weren't great either mainly because all that time in the kitchen led to problems in my feet. I finally got so spooked I went to urgent care for an x-ray, which of course found nothing, and followed up with a podiatrist, who diagnosed me with "overuse", which seems to be medical jargon for "getting old".
My anxieties relieved, I was able to really enjoy myself. That Friday turned out well and Saturday I had friends take me out for both brunch and a midday meal. Sunday I dined with Uncle Betty before we hit the bars and then paid for it on Monday. New Year's Eve day was games with JB & Co. and New Year's Day was games with new friends in North Park.
As a result, I've ridden the rollercoaster from feeling nearly abandoned to feeling surrounded with love. I'm looking forward to getting back to something of an even keel.