Jun. 26th, 2014 09:48 am
Immer bereit
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
muckefuckI try to keep the Old Man on his toes. That's why first thing this morning, I asked him: "Should I make you a list of people to be notified in the event of my demise?"
It's less out-of-the-blue than it seems because I slept lightly last night and dreamt of some people I'm estranged from and may never talk to again. Which, of course, got me thinking of everyone I've regretted losing touch with over the years. Given my middle age and the general harshness of life in this world, some of those people must be dead.
Despina, for instance. I'm 99% sure that he died about four years ago. He was seriously ill and there was a desperate edge to our calls. Then silence. Unfortunately he'd reinvented himself yet again and nobody in his new circle seems to have known about me or Girlfag or any of his longstanding queer friends. So nobody knew to call us and we had no one to reach out to.
Contrast this with what happened when![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
danbearnyc passed away. We had enough mutual friends on LJ that I heard about it here, but just in case, one of his friends went through his e-mail and sent notifications to me and other people he'd corresponded with. (It was unfortunate that the e-mail this guy ended up replying to had the subject line "Dusky Cumrag" but also, given Dan's sense of humour, rather appropriate.) He even offered a sympathetic ear (although when I eventually did decide I was ready to take him up on this, I heard nothing back).
That all seems like the least I would want to see done for people who have cared for me over the years. Many are like Despina--isolated from the groups we were once embedded in so severed from the grapevine. Facebook casts a wide net, but still not wide enough to capture everyone.
It's less out-of-the-blue than it seems because I slept lightly last night and dreamt of some people I'm estranged from and may never talk to again. Which, of course, got me thinking of everyone I've regretted losing touch with over the years. Given my middle age and the general harshness of life in this world, some of those people must be dead.
Despina, for instance. I'm 99% sure that he died about four years ago. He was seriously ill and there was a desperate edge to our calls. Then silence. Unfortunately he'd reinvented himself yet again and nobody in his new circle seems to have known about me or Girlfag or any of his longstanding queer friends. So nobody knew to call us and we had no one to reach out to.
Contrast this with what happened when
danbearnyc passed away. We had enough mutual friends on LJ that I heard about it here, but just in case, one of his friends went through his e-mail and sent notifications to me and other people he'd corresponded with. (It was unfortunate that the e-mail this guy ended up replying to had the subject line "Dusky Cumrag" but also, given Dan's sense of humour, rather appropriate.) He even offered a sympathetic ear (although when I eventually did decide I was ready to take him up on this, I heard nothing back).That all seems like the least I would want to see done for people who have cared for me over the years. Many are like Despina--isolated from the groups we were once embedded in so severed from the grapevine. Facebook casts a wide net, but still not wide enough to capture everyone.
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