Yeah, but don't POC have plenty of reason to suspect a white person's motives in quizzing them about this stuff? So often it's to get validation, or reassurance, or out of being too lazy to look stuff up (not to mention treating people as reps of their race), and maybe you can't be honest anyway because you can't afford to antagonize anyone at work, etc. It's just so fraught, I think. I guess now that I think about it, a couple of people have told me stories about police harassment or related issues, but they brought it up, not me, and more in the sense of just telling a personal story than in trying to have a grand discussion about racism.